Tuesday, December 8, 2009

I don't feel Elf-ish

I don't feel like an elf this year. Every year, I am SO INTO Christmas. I love the shopping, the wrapping, the decorating, the cooking, the baking, the eating, the giving. I love it so much, that some friends of mine have deemed me one of Santa's Elves, LOL! I never get sick of Christmas. And this year, while I'm still doing all of my Elfly duties... my heart just isn't quite into it. For the first time in my entire adult life (okay, my WHOLE life), I cannot manage to find my Christmas cheer.

~if found, please return said Christmas cheer to Jenn... she misses it dearly~

I don't know... I keep thinking the magic of the holiday season HAS to find it's way into my heart. The closest it's come thus far, was at Disneyland with all of the holiday decorations and music. It was very close to penetrating the humbug in me. But then, just like that, it vanished into the thin, cold air.

I know all parts of my family (immediate and extended) have been hit pretty hard with the 'financial crisis' this year and last. My household took a HUGE paycut... so we're all feeling the stress of that. And I know that must have some bearing on things. But we're getting through it. A few less presents under the tree this year, but honestly, the kids are still going to be thrilled with all the stuff they're getting. The Hubs and I aren't shopping for each other this year, our new floors and tickets to an Angels playoff game were our gifts to ourselves. So there's that much less to wrap (and look at). But I can't imagine that's the problem here... The rain (which keeps my husband from working, which means no paycheck), family members in critical condition (my husbands grandmother on one side, and grandfather on the other), and my pregnancy hormones (despite the fact that I am overjoyed about this new life) must all be at play here. Chalk it up to stress and emotions.

OK, so suck it up. The inside of the house is decorated beautifully, and it looks so cozy inside with my new floors. Next, I need to get the outside decorated. Then watch a few holiday movies (Charlie Brown Christmas tonight!!) and do some baking. Maybe I'll find my holiday spirit in a batch of cookies or Rice Crispy treats? Sounds good to me.

The elf in me is bound to come out soon...